Hey everyone, I hope you’re all doing really well since I last caught up with you around 10 days ago now whoops!
Sorry about that y’all, and yes I know I seem to say that all the damn time lately and yes, I can totally see you virtually eye rolling at me ‘cause let me tell you, I’m eye rolling at myself too; My time management is completely off kilter right now but I’m working really damn hard to try and rectify that, it’s just taking a little longer than expected…
Life happens, it’s a saying that is thrown around all the damn time but it is a phrase that I can relate to SO MUCH right now! Life really is happening, I feel like I’ve blinked and we’re in July, like srsly how the heck has that happened for crying out loud?
I spent the first weekend of July (aka the best month ever) in Glasgow, one of my absolute fave cities in the UK having first visited late last summer.
We were up in bonny Scotland for TRNSMT festival, which, in case you missed my gushing over on Instagram or in my latest vlog, was bloody amazing to say the least! It was a weekend that felt totally care free, a weekend filled with lashings of sunshine, laughter, warm cider and awesome music. It was the first weekend in a while that actually felt like a weekend, a couple of days off where I didn’t think of anything work related and I just let my hair down!
It was honestly OH SO refreshing!
I thought I’d quickly mention TRNSMT as today’s look is what I originally had in mind to wear for one of our days in Glasgow. It’s the perfect festival get up if you ask me, made up of layers, for the usually temperamental British Summertime weather. However, as we all bloody know the weather has been somewhat spectacular for the past three weeks, the best summer I think we’ve ever had in all my life, seriously I’ve never known British weather like this. And with that, naturally the gorgeous oatmeal corduroy co-ord wasn’t exactly the best thing to wear in a packed field in 30 degree sunshine… but alas I wanted to share it with you anyway in case you’re looking for a touch of festival styling ideas OR just a casual summer look in general, for when the weather cools down at least.
There’s something about corduroy in this colour that has me hooked! I’m honestly a woman obsessed and I’ve not exactly been quiet about it. The super seventies fabric is naturally right up my street, but when teamed in this gorgeous natural shade which has become my go-to colour lately, it works to really modernise the somewhat retro fabric.
But unfortunately, it’s a little too toasty for anything cord right now so I’m going to pop this little co-ord away for the time being and no doubt whack it out when it eventually (and sadly) cools off again.
But, do not fret as these kind of pieces are perfect for the colder months too, simply throw on a fine knit polo neck for some serious retro vibes, a pair of deniers and some patent ankle boots and you’ve got yourself another tremendous look using you summer co-ord, just dang fabulous don’t you think?
The striped T-shirt works to add yet more retro vibes and also some much needed colour to the neutral base. My T-shirt collection is rapidly getting out of hand but in all honesty I don’t see this slowing down anytime soon, they’re just so bloody versatile and my absolute go-to’s for all my styling woes.
And lastly, I couldn’t possibly round up this look without mentioning these epic platform Adidas Samba trainers now could I!? HELLOOOOO! I spied these on Instagram not long ago and when they popped up in my ASOS “New In” I just knew they had to be mine. I simply adore the contrast of the white base with the jet black stripes set against the chocolate brown rubber sole, which is a good 3 inches to say the least. I’ve been absolutely LOVING trainers lately and plan to do a little trainers styling/collection video very soon if you’re keen?
But anyway, with the awesome weather, TRNSMT festival and of course me turning 26 last week (how the heck did that happen) things have been a little bit chaotic lately. My home and social life is really rather rocking indeed, and work is going SO damn well, but as is often the case when one thing is going well, something else slacks a little and I feel that has happened here on my blog and I don’t like it one bit. As I’ve said before my blog is my baby, despite the constant worries that blogs are a thing of the past, I truly do hate it when I don’t have the time to dedicate myself to it and give it my all.
I’ve been relatively strict with my blog schedule for the past 5 years but this year has seen schedules of all sorts slipping from time to time and for that I am sorry. I love routine, I love having a schedule and when I give someone, or in this case something, my word, I always like to stick to it. But sometimes life just happens AMIRIGHT!? This year has been quite the rollercoaster and not always for the most exciting of reasons.
I’ve had more moments of feeling lost than I’ve ever had before whilst on this blogging journey and it’s knocked me for six.
We all have them (right!?) but to think that we’re in July and I’m still struggling scares me a little.
SUNGLASSES- c/o QUAY, EARRINGS- c/o & OTHER STORIES, STAR NECKLACE- c/o CHAMBERS & BEAUT HERE & HERE, JACKET- MONKI, SKIRT- MONKI, T-SHIRT- c/o & OTHER STORIES, TRAINERS- ADIDAS
There are a few contributing factors to this but I think one of the biggie’s is still the whole guilt thing about this being my actual real life job.
I feel so insanely lucky to be able to do this for a living and I absolutely, truly and whole-heartedly adore it, or else I wouldn’t bother.
Being a full-time blogger wasn’t something I ever planned on or ever strived for, it’s just something that snowballed and here I am 5 years in with a blog, a YouTube channel, an Instagram and Twitter account and I feel guilty when I’m struggling to keep up with it all.
I’m not saving lives, I’m not *really* helping anyone and I feel SO completely guilty when I don’t have the time to write/film/edit or when I can’t conjure up the words or the ideas, when I’ve had my confidence knocked through cruel comments and physically cannot bear to have a camera in my face. It’s often a cycle of really wanting and perhaps forcing the ideas to come to me yet not believing in my abilities enough to execute them. I know that I have worked extremely hard to get to where I am today, to create the world I’m now in, yet the guilt still creeps in. Even when I’m out in meetings, press trips or events which are all part of my job, the guilt still finds its way to unsettle me as those things set me back with my usual upload schedule. Perhaps I have imposter syndrome? Or perhaps I’m just a massive control freak who needs to give it up a little? Or perhaps it’s a bit of both, who the heck knows!
Perhaps I need to stop being so hard on myself and just go with the flow a little more, I mean there’s that age old saying of “quality over quantity” right? Perhaps I need to chant those words to myself the next time I get myself into a tizz about words/visions/ideas not coming to me as quickly or as easily as I would like them to or as they used to. Or perhaps I just need to believe in myself a little more or admit that I need some help with it all? Maybe it’s time to make this one man band a two or three man band? Who the bloody hell knows what will happen and I don't really know how this post took this unexpected turn but hey I’m just letting my fingers do the talking and probably giving too much of myself away again (sorry mum) but hey, this has always been my little venting ground and I appreciate all of your feedback and comments to chat it out with, I really do.
So anyway, with that one almighty waffle I will love you and leave you.
And I will be back at 10am on Thursday morning as *almost* usual but I think the moral of the story here is that we need to be a little less hard on ourselves, to not beat ourselves up when something isn’t working out the way it once did, when patterns, schedules, opinions and lifestyles change. It’s so easy to get bogged down about things and wanting them to go back to how they once were, but the truth is, if that was to happen, I wouldn’t have my home, my puppies, two very exciting projects to be working on behind the scenes (another reason my schedule is struggling) so change is ultimately good, I just need to learn to TRY and embrace it and try and get some help with both the work load and the being kinder to myself.
Watch this space
Christina Jane says
First of all, this outfit looks GORGEOUS!! Secondly, I can totally relate to how you are feeling. I am a freelance writer and I have recently been struggling to find inspiration and motivation, which definitely makes me feel guilty and struggle with imposter syndrome. However, I think when you are self-employed it is only natural for routines to change and to go through ups and downs.
Even though you aren’t saving lives you definitely are putting smiles on people’s faces and making others feel inspired, which is amazing!
Can’t wait to see what your secret projects are! 🙂 x
Megan Ellaby says
Hey Gorgeous Girl,
As always thank you so much for taking the time to chat it out with me in the comments, it always means so much seeing your pretty face here 🙂
I am glad and sad to hear you’re dealing with similar sorts of feelings as me. It’s really tough isn’t it but it makes me feel a little better to learn I’m not alone in how I’m feeling.
I wish they taught you “how to be your own boss” at school, that sure would make things a little easier.
Thanks so much for what you said about putting smiles on peoples faces ,that honestly means so much x
Ava Caitlin says
Megan you truly are an amazing human being and I never want you to forget that. I can see how juggling so much can get you down but you should never feel guilty. You have worked so hard to get to where you are today, so much that you haven’t realised you have because you love doing it so much and most of us understand when and if you need time. Hey you’re only human and as for not helping people I must say you have been my saving grace. I was struggling with depression and didn’t really know who I was anymore until I found you and your channel. You reminded me that I was a quirky fashion loving girl who loved playing with clothes and wearing something a little different. That brought me out of my shell more than any therapy or medication could and I will always be greatful for that.
I always look forward to your amazing content to get me through my week but don’t burn yourself out over it. I hope you have a wonderful and beautiful day.
Lots of Love
Megan Ellaby says
Oh Ava, stop it! Thank you babes, that really made me smile.
It is honestly incredible to hear how my content has been your saving grace, wow that really is magic, but I am SO sorry that you’ve been struggling yourself! I really hope you’re doing okay now and that you’re LOVING styling yourself each and every day, it means the world to know I may have helped in just a small way.
Loads of love gorgeous girl and thanks oh so much for your beautiful comment x
I absolutely adore your blog, Instagram and YouTube channel – you inspire me to be more creative and colourful with my styling choices and have been an inspiration in making me want to move back home to Manchester again after 3 years in London. Yes, you might not be saving lives, but you do a lot for your followers in other ways!
Please keep it up, don’t be so hard on yourself, we’re all extremely excited to hear about the projects you’ve been working on! And if you ever want an assistant, it would finally be the job to get me back up North haha 😉
Love the outfit as usual btw x
Megan Ellaby says
Hey Amy, thank you so much for the lovely words, it truly means so SO much!
You know what I say… Make the move back to Manchester, you know it’s only right as it’s the best city in the world 😉 aahah!
Loads of love and good luck with everything babe whether it’s London or Manchester, you’ve got this! x
Pam xx says
I am new to your blog Megan, my daughter’s have got me addicted! I love your posts and seeing what bits you have bought whether it be clothing or homeware, you have given me lots of inspiration! PLEASE keep doing what you do best, I don’t want to lose you now! Big hugs x
Megan Ellaby says
Ohhh Pam, HI! And huge thanks for reading and thanks so much to your daughters for passing on my blog, thats SO awesome to know that there’s a family of fabulous ladies reading along!
Thank you so much for the lovely comment, means a lot. I’m not going anywhere 😉 x
I have never commented on any blogger’s social media before, but as I read your post I felt like there was things I could say to maybe make you feel better.
I am a 25 year old architecture student from Brazil and even though we live in completely different countries and don’t share the same realities I can still relate to you as a young adult who is trying to build a life that brings me joy but also is caring of others.
What I’m trying to say is that I understand your worries about working in something that doesn’t directly help anyone (such as doctor saving people’s lives). But you know, I think that the world needs a little bit of everything, and maybe you are not saving lives, but you are helping people to build confidence. You said in some of your vlogs that you were very much inspired by Alexa Chung. That was also my case. Her style literally changed my life, because before her I didn’t really understand women’s clothing and ended up dressing as a boy. When I was twelve, I was often mistaken for a boy and hated it. It was just when I realized that dressing as a girl didn’t necessarily mean tight clothes and exposing my body that I started to dress differently and get more confident. I started making more friends and became a happier person.
What I’m trying to say is that you can be this person, the “Alexa Chung” for other girls. You are such a nice role model, Megan. A smart, independent, cultured and lovely woman. We need more of people like you in the world.
As an architecture student I interned in an architecture office where they only did projects for very rich people. As you probably know, Brazil is a country with severe social inequality, and for that reason I felt very guilty working in this particular job. I felt like I wasn’t helping anyone – an I actually think it was a disservice for my country. You see, in a place were there are a lot of people living in the streets it didn’t seem to make much sense to build a house with eight car spots and a semi-olympic pool.
Now I’m in a different internship, working as a graphic designer for children’s books, and even though that doesn’t really sound like a particularly important job (again not saving lives haha), I feel like I am doing something that can help and touch people.
Helping others and doing a job you feel that matters has to do with your content, but also has to do with how you shape your vlogs or your writing, with how you approach people. I sincerely think you are doing a very nice job. Brings me joy to watch your videos, and your clothes and your cheerfulness inspire me. Remember the reach you can have with the internet! It is amazing! I’m in Brazil for Christ’s sake!
I hope you feel better!
Sorry if my writing is a little off. Our punctuation rules are a bit different in Portuguese, so I may have committed a few mistakes!
Continue doing what your doing!
Megan Ellaby says
WOW Luisa, thank you SO bloody much for taking the time to write that almighty comment, I think you may have just won the award for the longest comment to ever grace this blog, THANK YOU!
Thanks also for sharing your story, it’s nice to hear that you’re now doing something you love and designing for children’s books must be SO fun and SO rewarding, amazing!
I can’t quite believe you’re reading this in Brazil, now that is truly bonkers, wowowow the internet is crazy! Thanks for the pep talk babe, I deffo needed it and you’ve made me feel tonnes better!
P.S your english is spectacular!!!!
Once again, a gorgeous post Megan! I totally understand you feeling this way about your job. Not many years ago, people didn’t even know what blogging was, let alone that it could be a real job. But the times are changing and you’re right in the middle of it. I feel like these days people feel the need to express themselves and their creativity more and more and need some sort of distraction from their everyday life. With so many people suffering from burnout or similar mental health illnesses, offering a place of creativity and inspiration online is a job that is becoming very important in my opinion.
I personally love discovering your blog posts because your ideas are so UNIQUE, seriously I don’t know where you take all the inspiration from! Can’t wait for those secret projects of yours too, since everything you touch seems to turn out amazingly I feel like they will be AWESOME!
Lots of love xx
Megan Ellaby says
Marlena, thank you, truly from the bottom of my heart for your gorgeous email. It’s really got me thinking about a few things, demons if you will and allowed me to put them to bed, for now at least.
I can’t wait to share what I’ve been working on and truly, truly hope you love it!
I saw this corduroy two-piece in your video and I fell in love with it, even if I hate the colour.
Megan Ellaby says
You hate the colour!?!?!? No way! HAHA I’m obsessed with that colour! Glad you’re still digging though babes 😉 x
You absolutley deserve all the good things that come your way, you’ve earned it!xx
Megan Ellaby says
Ohhhh darling thank you so much x