We're well on our way into January, but I still can't quite shake the feeling of reflection. Reflecting on what 2017 brought with it, both good and bad, and hoping that 2018 is just as good and less as bad, if you catch my drift.
Resolutions wise, you know I love them, but I'm more of a seasonal goal setter, of which you can read the latest of here, aside from continuing with my fitness journey, reading more, giving less of a shit and learning to drive I'm swerving resolutions and focusing on what I learnt from last year and how to put those lessons into play for the year ahead.
I'm feeling a little bit rusty on the ole blogging game right now. I don't know if it's a little bit of self doubt or if 12 days off from work and drinking too much prosecco and eating too much cheese, have turned my brain to mush, most likely a combination of the two, so do bare with me if the posts are few and far between for the next week or two. I'm having trouble thinking of fresh ideas. Perhaps I need a digital detox altogether, or a holiday that will hopefully bring with it "thinking" time that will leave me awash with inspiration and ideas. Or perhaps I just need to not force it. Maybe it's time I just stopped caring, for a week or two and just see how that treats me?
I don't really know what I'm saying.
All I know is that this new year hasn't brought with it the optimism and excitement that previous years have. I'm feeling uninspired, deflated and dare I say it, out of the loop.
But alas, I'm sure this feeling won't last too long and until then, here are some of the key life lessons that 2017 brought with it and how I'm going to tackle them head on throughout 2018 and beyond.
I'm gonna kick off with some key adult life lessons about money, mortgages and accounting. Three words that send my stomach somersaulting at the thought of them.
I've been running my own business, full time for the past three years and I've only just got my head around the accounting side of things. That's even with an accountant carefully trying to explain each and every aspect of it to thicko Ellaby over here. The penny finally dropped in the summer of last year, mainly when I was in the process of purchasing our house. I had no choice really but to understand what the heck was going on with my money, so I set up countless meetings with my accountants, financial advisor and after some dumbed down explanations from mine and George's parents I FINALLY got to grips with the whole thing.
And alas I feel a lot more stable because of it and in-turn much more grown up and put together of sorts.
The real life lesson of this, and something for you to think about if you're not quite grasping it yet is don't push it and certainly don't beat yourself up about it the way I did. The lightbulb moment will happen and you'll finally pull your adult socks up and be ready to make the next move in business or in life, just give it time.
Despite what I thought I knew about myself I've learnt this year that I actually really bloody enjoy exercise. Since taking the plunge and finally booking that all important first personal training session I've learnt SO much about myself and my body. I've learnt that it really is true what they say about exercise and endorphins, who'd have thought it hey? That thing I was adamant was a myth, is in-fact very true indeed and I leave the gym feeling SO good about life, work and about myself. I want to continue feeling this way so will vouch to stick with Kaif, my wonderful personal trainer and see just what my body is capable of. I'm determined to have this summer as the summer where I don't feel self conscious, I want to feel great and I want to love myself and what I see looking back at me in the mirror.
Last year I was really let down by someone I loved. They were a big part of my life for some time and they let me down big time. I felt like my heart was broken and to be honest, it kind of still is.
As sad as it is that, that particular friendship broke down, it taught me a lot about myself as a person, as a friend and as a business woman. It taught me not to trust people as easily and as fully as I do. I've had this problem throughout my life but it's only now, at twenty five years old that I'm able to realise that something needs to change. I'm trusting and I'm loyal by nature, but this was the final straw. This kind of betrayal and greed was enough to make me realise that I needed to alter a little bit. Not fully. Just a little bit to make myself tougher and a better woman overall.
I've learnt that sadly, people let you down. Even those you love and trust the most in life. So in order to not let the same heartaches happen twice over, I've learnt to be more of a closed-book for a little longer, to keep my cards close to my chest and to not rely on others. It's taught me to be more self sufficient, something I have been for the past five years since I set this little blog up by myself and it's something I will continue to do so with even more gusto from here on out.
HAT- TOPSHOP, BLAZER- ALEXA CHUNG c/o NET-A-PORTER, JUMPER- PRIMARK (SIMILAR HERE), TROUSERS- c/o FINERY LONDON, TRAINERS- ALEXANDER MCQUEEN, BAG- ASOS (SOLD OUT)
Another personality lesson I learnt last year is that it's actually alright to be an awkward person.
For all of my adult life I've spent countless hours fretting over the fact that I feel awkward amongst crowds. That I feel as if my personality is swallowed up whenever I meet someone who is self assured and loud, and as if everyone around me has noticed this and in-turn thinks I'm weird or even worse... Rude.
I've learnt that you know what, this is just me and it's actually what makes me the person I am. I'm a little awkward and sometimes quiet, but once I'm comfortable I'm fun, loving and a hoot to be around, if I do say so myself.
I'm using this little bit of realisation to love myself a little more, to give myself the credit I deserve and to not be so damn hard on myself. I met some incredible ladies last year who are always unapologetically themselves, flaws and all, and I totally admired them for it. I took a leaf out of their books having left their company feeling inspired and promised myself to always be myself, awkwardness and all, 'cause thats just who I am and those who matter in life will love me for it.
Unfortunately last year I realised that the online world is cruel.
As I've mentioned, I've spent the past 5 years online and have been lucky enough to be spared any kind of online hate; that is until 2017. I guess it's through growing on YouTube and I suppose in general online that unfortunately trolls come out of the woodwork, but it doesn't mean it is an easy pill to swallow.
I was bullied as a teenager, so any form of criticism whether that be personality traits, the way I look (yeah I said it), or something about my life, cuts like a knife and really, truly upsets me.
It pains me that because we have found ourselves in a career that involves us sharing online, that some people automatically feel that it's okay to be cruel to us. It's something I'm praying will change in 2018 as more people stand up to these trolls, the way Lydia Millen did late last year, I was so proud of her that day for standing up for herself in the composed way that she did.
However, despite realising that the online world is cruel, I also learnt that I am getting stronger. The more words you read about yourself online and the more you talk it through with people who know and love you, the more you realise how ridiculous it all is. The things they say are often completely fabricated and down right hilarious, so why should I get upset about them anymore?
I'm becoming a tough old cookie in my old age and I'm really rather enjoying it!
And finally I learnt what a fabulous platform I have here online. 2017 allowed me to meet SO many of you and allowed me to do my bit to give back to my community through my charity sale. It's a powerful thing to be able to give back and I've learnt how wonderful it is to use my platform to do some good. It's taught me to do more and to do good, always. I'm hoping to come back this year with another charity clothes sale and hopefully some other bits and pieces to use the platforms I have built online to give something back and to do some good to help in anyway I can, plus it's always SO wonderful to meet you lovely bunch!
Just a few life lessons that 2017 brought with it.
It felt good to write that down I must admit. Some of those things I've been itching to talk about for some time so I'm somewhat relieved to have gotten them off my chest. And whilst I'm still feeling a little apprehensive about the year ahead, I think thats okay. It's okay to not be confident with your abilities all the time, to not feel inspired all the time because what comes out the other side is often way better anyway. It's how we get over these mini hurdles that's the important thing.
I'd love to hear about your life lesson(s) of the past year, so please, if you like, share them in the comments below.
Thanks, as always for reading. It truly means the world.
x M
Megan, i just loved reading this! Thank you so much for being this honest.
Everything you said about your personality and awkwardness resonates with me so much it’s unbelievable. I feel just the same but have never known how to put it into words.
The bit about sharing so much online has also struck a chord as i’m kind of just starting out with a interior blog and feel really exposed on Instagram some days.
I almost wish someone would create a social media e-course that doesn’t just deal with how to get more followers and take great pictures, but how to deal with being online, how to balance your life so your brain doesn’t become swamped, and how to deal with negative comments.
Thank you again for sharing. I love following your feed and IG stories. They make me smile so much. Stay just as you are.
Love, Kasie
I follow you on Youtube and this is the first blog post I have read from you. Some very deep lessons you have learnt! I became a Mama to a puppy (like you) last year and I think the thing I learnt the most was having that responsibly is massive, I’ve stopped going out all hours, been more conscious of my time and even had to travel across the North East to drop him off at relatives to make sure he’s not on his own. Which has been a big learning curve. Katie x
Ahhh Katie thanks so much for coming over here from YouTube, truly means a lot!
Couldn’t agree with you more about the puppy mamma thing, a lot of work but SO rewarding! xoxo
Such a brilliant post Megan! Be kind to yourself and if you need a few weeks or January off to get the mojo/spark back then do it! Your fans will still be here.
Ohhhh Nina thank you so much for being so lovely and understanding! I totally, truly appreciate it <3 x
Thank you Megan for sharing. I have to admit that your blogs, instagram account and youtube keep me happy and smiley on the days that I feel complete and utter turd, I apologise for the using such a yuck word but it truly is the best word to describe how I feel sometimes. I stumbled across your youtube when you were about 30k subscribers in and I haven’t looked back since. It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one that feels like I may stick out like a sore thumb for wearing clothes that express the way I feel, make me happy and look seriously styling (if I say so myself hehe) even if I get compliments and side eyes both in equal measure. You’ve actually helped to get back a bit of confidence when it comes to fashion, having been stuck in a bit of a “I’m getting old, I love this top but how the hell do I style it rutt” with your inspirational posts and youtube vids. Last year was a pretty pap year for me as I found out my fiancé has a pretty serious illness, feeling a bit silly getting teary as I write this. Breathe. Anyway from that moment I’ve had to seriously put a few things into perspective, and not sweat the small stuff. I appreciate time and have felt that when days are tough you are always an inspiring woman that helps me laugh, be myself and genuinely like myself. Just had to write something from the heart to let you know you’re a pretty neato lady indeed and when I think about being in London and trying to be strong through hard times to come when it comes down to it, I can do it, and my Stella Mccartney elyse trainers help me walk that little but taller, hehe. Thank you
Oh WOW Saff thank you darling! Means the world that what I’m putting out there cheers you up and keeps you happy, wow thats so awesome!
You’re absolutely not the only one who loves to express themselves through clothes! I’m so glad you’ve found the confidence to do so!
Thanks also for sharing your story, it’s definitely put things into perspective and I truly hope you and your Fiance are okay and that he gets better soon. You’re SO right about not sweating the small stuff and I can’t explain how much you sharing means to me. I will think twice from now on!
Also v much LOVING the stella mccartney walking taller reference, thats ma girl 😉
x
Loved the post, Megan! I enjoyed reading about all of your highs and even how and what you learned from your down moments. You inspire me everyday to keep creating so keep up the amazing work in 2018! Looking stunning along course! Lots of love!
Georgie x
Ohhh Georgie thank you darling! Keep creating for reals! and lets have an awesome 2018… Despite the slow start on my part! xo
Was the friendship breakdown you and Sophie? Have noticed her absence. If so, really sort to hear that xxx
I had the same thought as Kate and wondered where Sophie was over recent months. I suspected there had been a falling out. While most people don’t let us down, unfortunately some people do disappoint us or turn out to be quite different to what we once thought. It’s certainly wise to be cautious and selective with who you trust Megan, but inevitably we all get hurt on occasion through life. I’m sorry you were wounded but don’t let the barstards change your beautiful spirit! It is nice to see you maturing as a woman through your writing. Xx
Thanks for always being so lovely Deb, really appreciate it as always!
Love this post, such wise words! It is so important to reflect on what you have learnt and your outfit is fab! x
Ah, was the breakdown with you and sophie perchance? i’ve noticed she hasn’t been doing your pics for a while, if so that’s a shame it broke down – i’ve had a few friendships breakdown and it’s so hard, weirdly harder sometimes than breaking up with a boyfriend. You, along with shot from the street are one of the most genuine youtube / bloggers out there. The honesty you both have is so inspiring. It can be hard sometimes when you see the grid of gorgeous outfits and think that life is always rosy for bloggers, but you guys keep it real!!! good luck in the new year, we all have moments of ideas block, but i find reading articles and just taking a walk really helps, and now you have your lovely dogs to distract you! Chin up, it’ll all be fine, just focus on the lovely world you’ve created and worked hard for!
Ahhhh thanks lovely, means a lot that you’re enjoying both my outfits and my personal posts. They’re always a little trickier to write and to share but reading comments like yours makes it SO worth it! Thank you! xo
This post has really resonated with me in many ways. So many important lessons I need to take on board for myself too so thank you for sharing this. As a fellow awkward person, I’ve also tried to embrace that about my personality in 2017 instead of coming away from conversations mentally cringing at myself afterwards haha. I hope we both get to overcome this in 2018! 🙂 Sorry to hear you’ve felt deflated and been through some rough times this past year, hope you start to feel better soon, sending you lots of positive vibes your way for this year 🙂 Wishing you all the happiness for 2018 Megan!
VioletDaffodils
xx
Ahh Kate you’re welcome! I’m so glad you enjoyed the post!
YES I am SO with you on the mentally cringing once you’ve left someone… IT’s the WORST!!!!
Thank you gorge, right back atcha for a happy 2018 x
This is such an honest story. And I think its really admirable that you are being so honest to yourself. Especially the part about feeling slightly awkward amongst other people really gets to me since I’ve felt similar my whole life. Even when being among friends or family I found myself wondering “why can’t I be more like this and be less like that”…. It can be quite hard sometimes to be yourself when being around certain people. Many times I felt like I had to change a little in order to be a great part to the group or to feel like that is how the other people like me most.
Your words really inspired me to make 2018 a year of giving my best without obsessing over things and to just approach every challenge with an easy mind. Lets hope that works for at least a month lol.
To an awesome new year and all the best wishes to you!
xx Marlena
Marlena, I’m so glad you enjoyed this post… It was quite hard to write I must say but definitely felt quite cathartic all the same.
Lots of love x
Meghan,
I think we have all been through the same things at some point in our lives and ultimately, it is how you choose to process, deal and move on from it and your 2017 life lessons show you’re really learning to put yourself first and be good to yourself.
I too have recently bought a house with my husband and we’re about to have a baby and as terrifying as it all is, once I accepted that I’m capable and can do this, it all slotted into place and I started to see myself as a capable badass.
I’ve also been screwed over multiple times by people I trusted and letting them go and often realising it isn’t even about you, is all you can do to save your sanity.
And as for people generally being arseholes, they’re showing themselves for what they are. They’re hiding behind a handle and wouldn’t have the balls to speak to someone like that irl. I’m shocked on a daily basis by the utter lack of respect and general abuse people suffer when they work online, it’s abhorrent. But it’s quite clear that they are small, cowardly little people who need to attempt to make others feel small in order to feel big. If you don’t need to do that, you’re already a country mile ahead of them. Let shitty people be shitty and you do you.
Your platform is great, and your passion and personality shine through. Give your mojo time to come back – remember, January is the Monday of the year! X
LEANNE! Thank you for the seriously gorgeous comment, it really mans so much! I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with dickhead people also (ha!) but you’re SO right about them being the small, cowarfly little people!
Thank you! Lots of love and hears to a positive 2018! x
I’m not good in English, but I try to write all my thoughts and feelings after reading your post. It’s normal to feel what you feel. If you need to take a break, do it. You inspire all of us. We love you. Only after your YouTube chanel I realized how cool to have your own style and not to be as the same. I really wish you’ll find new inspiration, new thoughts and come back to us.
Thank you Irina, your words mean a lot! Thank you x
Hi Megan
You mentioned feeling out of the loop: this might just be me, but I lived in Manchester for years, first in Castlefield then the Northern Quarter. As soon as I finally moved out of the city centre to get a “proper house” I felt exactly like you said- out of the loop. I’m not sure where you’ve moved to, and this may not even be the same problem for you, but I thought I’d mention it just in case.
I still work in Manchester city centre and rather than just driving to work and back I started to make myself go out in Manchester: after work drinks, vintage shopping on my lunch hour on Oldham St, eating lunch somewhere I used to go to frequently, or even just wondering around St Peters Square or a stroll up Oxford Road with my favourite songs on my headphones. It all helped me feel re-connected and inspired again.
As I said, it might not be the same issue and I’m sure you’re totally loving your new home (as I do), but I thought I’d share just in case it helps 🙂
Xx
OMG Hannah you might be right here you know!
I’m currently in nesting mode and loving it, but I do miss the city. I’m going to actively make a change and head into town a little more often and see if it works.
I have a funny feeling it will so THANK YOU so much for sharing! xo
Megan! Thank you so much for sharing! I really admire you and appreciate what you have to say! When you talked about embracing your awkwardness, it really spoke to me as I’ve been struggling with the exact same thing, especially over the past few years. It’s encouraging to know that I’m not alone and it’s ok! Best wishes to you, Megan. You’re a true inspiration!
Ahhh Victoria thank you for your lovely comment, it’s so lovely to hear from you!
You’re TOTALLY NOT alone when it comes to feeling awkward I promise! Even just here in the comments many people have expressed how they feel the same, it makes me feel better also to know that I’m not the only one!
Thanks for being so gorgeous and happy 2018 x
Thank you, Megan, for always writing such inspiring and insightful blogposts. I am for sure taking some things from here. In the past year or two I have also realised how naive I am with people and their intentions, because I have always thought that all people are created somewhat equal and if I don’t have bad intentions, they wouldn’t too. Sadly, I have realised that that is so not the case and I have been trying to get a grip on myself and try to be a less of an oversharing person.
Here’s to a good 2018!
xx,
http://www.thedecemberdame.com
Oh wow thank you! That is so kind of you to say about my posts! I’m really glad you enjoyed this one but yes naivety and wishful thinking with people is definitely where I go wrong sometimes. Here’s to being a little more cautious with what we share, but not loosing our true selves along the way! x
This year didn’t start with me feeling that optimistic either – but hopefully that can change like you say! I’m starting to realise that exercise is something I might actually love (but also loathe haha) too – I always feel so much better after I’ve worked out and totally want to get to summer and feel just how you explained!
I hope 2018 brings you all the best! xxx
We can indeed girlie! We’ve SOOO got this!
xx
Beautiful lady; first of all I just wanted to say that you need to remove any pressure from yourself right now. I know it’s easier said than done but I completely know what you mean about going into the new year feeling a little lost; there’s so many resolutions and goal posts flying around and whilst I have set myself some personal goals, I’m not going to kill myself trying to achieve them. I’m also not going to feel like I need to have my shit together by the 1st of January 2018 as there are some big changes going on in my life right now, which is exciting but I’m going to give myself some time to adapt rather than feeling like it should have already happened, and you should do. All I’m going to say is keep doing what you’re doing because you’re truly amazing! You are one of my biggest inspirations, an absolute BOSS and your style is just insane – so you just keep doing you bbygal and take all of the time you need! <3 P.s I totally know what you mean by accounting, I'm still so lost and my accountant has to speak to me like I'm about 5 haha! Also, it sucks that you were let down by someone you loved last year, BUT these things are a blessing in disguise because you find out who your true friends are and who you can really trust.
Love you always <3
Hayley xo
http://www.frockmeimfamous.com
Hayley! Thank you darling, it truly means the world! I miss you v much you know, it’s literally been 2 years… WTF IS THAT ABOUT!?!?!?!
I’m glad I’m not the only one who feels like an utter dumbo when it comes to accounting… LMAO what are we like ey!?
x
Hi Megan,
I loved this post. These past 6 months for me have been so tough as i’ve really struggled with my own mental health. I unfortunately lost my grandma who was my best friend in the whole entire world and also my dad got diagnosed with leukaemia. Your videos and blog posts have been much of a safety net for me through those times when i’ve just wanted to lay in bed crying. I’ve learnt to treasure every second with my nearest and dearest, hug them a little harder and never go a day without telling them how much i love them. I’m so sorry to see you’re going through a tough time after the breakdown of a friendship but i recently saw a quote which i’m going to use as my mantra for 2018 “you’re growing from this, you’re glowing from this” although at times things may seem like the crappest thing in the world, we will always make it to the other side and blossom and glow from all the things that we’ve learnt. I just know 2018 is going to be your year and i’ll be cheering you on every step of the way. Your light is bright Megan, keeping shining it!
Also i’ve recently been obsessed with a TV show on amazon prime called This Is Us. And Mandy Moore in it is giving me serious Megan Ellaby vibes haha, sucha babe!
Can’t wait to see all the things you achieve this year and i’m sorry for the essay!
Oh Jess, I am SO sorry to hear that you lost your Grandma this year 🙁 having lost grandparents myself I know how utterly earth shattering this can be. Sending you SO much love my darling.
I’m also really heartbroken to hear about your dad, I hope he’s doing all right and once again sending you and him lots of love and healing vibes!
Thank you for sharing your story, it really does mean a lot and allows me to put a lot of things into perspective. Thank you!
I’m also mildly obsessed with that quote, it’s SO true! What a beautiful sentiment, thank you for sending it my way, I will definitely try and remember that from here on out!
yet another thank you for cheering me on, you’re such a sweetie! I’m cheering you on too girl, and your Pop. Lots of love and thanks SO much for the beautiful comment, it really means the world xo
Hi Megan, I can completely relate to the breakup of a friendship. It’s one of the hardest parts of our mid twenties few talk about. I’ve found for myself and my friends, friendships change in either the best way possible or in the worst way. The pain is real, along with confusion and an added blow to your self confidence. One thing I’ve taken away from being let down is that I need to trust in myself most of all and in my intuition. From this heartache you’ll learn even more from yourself and what you’re capable of. It’s okay to take time and figure your shit out, you’re only human.
Lilly Pebbles post great videos on friendship and she’s also coming out with a book that I think will help us both.
Wishing you all the best xxx
Thanks Rachel, means a lot. Sorry you’ve had a friendship breakdown too 🙁
I’m SO excited about Lily’s book too x
I love this post and your honesty! Totally with you with the whole awkwardness thing. And thank God someone else is also feeling out of sorts with getting back into the swing of things. I felt like I was the only one who seemed to lack inspiration with my blog at the moment!
Yeah, theres a lot of positivity kicking about which is awesome, but I totally don’t feel overly positive about the new year, and I have no idea why! Lets hope we can find our sparkle v soon ey!? So glad you enjoyed this post darling xo
Ohhhh Megan you are so wonderful!
This was a lovely, honest and refreshing read, especially as I, too, have found myself feeling somewhat deflated since New Year and a little bit uncertain about the year ahead. There’s so much pressure as a new year rolls in, and an expectation that we need to have a long list of resolutions and all that “New Year New Me” jazz.
But sometimes, I think we all really need is just to be a little bit kinder to ourselves.
I just want to say thank you so so much for all your hard work! Your blogs, vlogs and instas are so inspirational and never fail to put a smile on my face.
I’m sure that this year has many magical things coming your way. x
Chloe, I could not agree with you more on being kinder to ourselves, we’re all so guilty of putting too much pressure on ourselves, especially at this time of year.
Thanks for being SO lovely, it truly means absolutely everything to hear (read) you say that!
Lots of love and sparkles for 2018 x
Hi Megan,
I felt compelled to comment as an awkward person, this really spoke to me! Thank you for putting into words what I think so many of us women feel – its ok to be awkward, sometimes shy and uncomfortable around big groups of people. I’m forever worrying how others will see me but forget that those closest to me know me and love me for me, and that’s what counts.
P.S I had tell you that your amazing, individual and unique style has really inspired me to think outside the box and try new things in my wardrobe – so thank you. With so many cookie cutter bloggers/influencers out there, you really stand out as you are unapologetically doing your own thing, which is awesome.
Oh Carly thank you for your gorgeous comment, it means a lot! I cant’ believe how many other women feel awkward amongst crowds the way I do. It’s really opened my eyes even more to realise that it’s not a bad thing at all! I’m really glad you could relate so much.
Thanks also for your words about cookie cutter bloggers, thats really kind and I’m so buzzing that you’re trying new things! YAAAAS GURRRL x
Love these Megan, and I’m with you on the accounting things – need to get a good bookkeeper and accountant who can explain everything on my level so taxes and house deposits aren’t a complicated math problem anymore!
Lauren x
Britton Loves | Cruelty-Free/Vegan Beauty • Lifestyle • Photography
So… since I’ve been following you, probably since august 2017, this is the very first post I completely read, not because of laziness, but because I enjoy photos more. But, I read this one. And I have to say… Im surprise by the way you’ve opened up and said such personal things. I feel like we’re caught up in a world where everything seems perfect and the truth is it isnt and this post proves that. It’s like bloggers and instagramers are afraid of showing a more “human” side, were no one has problems. I honestly cant stand instagram accounts filled with a gorgeous girl and her outfits, it’s like… dont you have friends and family? show us something more real. Anyways, I like the way you comunicate with your audience, I think its authentic and personal.
I sometimes feel uninspired, but I try to reconnect with the things I love most. movies, books, looking at old pictures. Let it flow. Inspiration will come along. Great post, great learnings!
Ahhhh thanks so much for reading this post then 🙂 What was it that made you sit down and have a read this time around?
A lot of my posts are of this ilk so I hope you’ll be back. I completely agree that we live in a “perfect” world. This is something I’m V keen to change!
x
Another perfect post! You are honestly such an inspiration to me and it’s so lovely to see how far you’ve come! I am starting to accept myself as an awkward person too! I always feel anxious and shy around new people and worry when I start to open up that people will think I’m just strange but now I’ve realised I just don’t care! x
Oh darling, I’m so glad you enjoyed this post and it’s nice to hear that I’m not the only awkward one out there. I actually can’t believe how many people have related to that part of the post, it’s crazy.
Thanks so much for reading and for taking the time out to comment xx
I always read your posts in your voice in my head ahaha, so funny. I really did adore this post and it’s made me think about what 2017 taught me because it was one hell of a year. I think my life lessons in 2017 mostly revolved around being diagnosed with a chronic disease and the 10 months of the year spent going on this rollercoaster journey of trying to control it. I learnt that life is really too short to take anything for granted as you honestly don’t know what can come along and bump you off track, I was 18, ready to move from Manchester to London to study Fashion and I realised I couldn’t do that anymore. I learnt that a lot of people are too consumed in themselves to be relied on, I learnt to truly appreciate every single good day and that even when I’m going through the shittest year of my life, I managed to pass A levels with A*AB, pass my driving test and get to 1/2 a festival (Y not, a disaster!!) and a girls holiday! I think in the long term the past year will have made me a much stronger person even though I felt so weak and little. Here’s to 2018 being a much brighter year for me and the brightest year for you!
Lucy Jane | Infinity of Fashion
Ohhhh Lucy Jane, thank you SO much for the kind words and for sharing your story!
I’m so sorry you’ve had a tough year 🙁 That really sucks! But it’s SO incredibly admirable to hear your beautiful positivity, it’s certainly made me think twice about moaning about menial things.
I smiled from ear to ear when I read all the amazing things you achieved in 2017, even whilst battling with something completely out of your hands, you’re a super star girlie!
Thanks so much for reading and taking the time to share 🙂 its SO kind of you!
Here’s to 2018 being brighter for sure babe xo
Megan, even if I’ve never missed a single post/video/Insta pic of yours, I rarely comment on anything. When I do though, it’s usually a novel so apologies in advance. This post has touched me deeply and I can relate to quite a few things you said up there so I thought I’d say a word. First of all, please, please don’t be too harsh on yourself. Even if it’s too much cheese and champagne, lack of inspiration, bitches who seemed to be close friends, or some internet freaks with very boring lives, don’t let them make you feel down, they have no right. You’re absolutely beautiful in every single way, you’re gorgeous, funny and kind, humble and hard-working and you inspire so many of us on a daily basis. You really should take screenshot of all the comments full of love and treat them as reminders of what a wonderful human being you are.
I know what you mean with the friendship, I know how it feels when someone you love, trust and basically treat like a family member does horrible things you’d never thought they would, as if you never meant that much to them at all. And you feel hurt and cheated, completely vulnerable and oh so stupid and angry at yourself for being so naive although it’s actually that other person who should take the blame. I know how it is and it breaks my heart to think someone did that to you, I mean, how could they?! I’m literally writing it with tears in my eyes and I don’t think I know enough swearwords to express how I feel about them. I just want to say I’m sorry, babe, I really am.
Also, thank you so much for the ‘it’s ok to be awkward’ part, it felt like reading my dairy. Those few people I call close friends would probably (well, hopefully!) say I’m all bubbly and fun to be with while in the crowd or, what’s even more, being around that one loud, attention-seeking person I suddenly turn into the quietest person in the room and I feel like a weirdo and just want to disappear. And then everyone thinks I’m either boring, too serious or rude, just because they don’t some the time to get to know me at all, throwing all the labels instead. It’s easier I guess, after all we rarely want to take our time to get to know anyone or anything, it’s easier to assume than make some effort after all.
As for the online cruelty, all the statistics and stuff… as much as I genuinely wish you only the sweetest comments and all the followers in the world because you flipping deserve it, I also have an impression that some of those who have millions of followers usually have ridiculous amounts of money, no personality at all and a desperate need of a brain transplant if such a thing existed. You don’t want to become that person. You are absolutely perfect as you are and although it’s painful and annoying that something you put all your heart and hard work in is not appreciated enough or simply trolled by some jealous idiots, be strong, lovely, and remember that you’re the best as you are and the main reason we love you is you being you.
Oh Mal, you’re SO sweet. You’ve commented before right? I remember your name, it’s lovely to hear from you again. Thank you SO much for the absolutely gorgeous comment, or novel should I say 😉 It means so much to know that I have you cheering me on from the sidelines, honestly, you’ll never know how much it means to me! I’m SO sorry that you’ve dealt with idiots recently too, it sucks doesn’t it, but I guess we must learn and grow from their faults to become better people in the long run, life is one big learning curve ey?
I love that you can relate to the being a little awkward part, thats SO ace to hear. It’s something that i don’t think gets discussed too often online so you can feel like you’re the only one with this weird little quirky trait but after writing this and hitting publish, the amount of gorgeous ladies who can relate has truly blown me away, making me believe, once more that being awkward isn’t such a bad thing afterall!
Thanks again for the gorgeous comment and i can’t wait to chat with you again real soon x
Hi Megan
What a great post, so honest and relatable!! I found your channel last year after I saw Zoella recommend which I am so thankful for but this is the first time I have been on your blog (I know sorry!) but 100% wont be my last. I love it when I get a notification saying you have a new video and as I am new I am currently binge watching all your old videos which is fab. I must say that as I am watching them backwards pretty much its amazing to see how you havent changed, the videos that I am watching now to the ones last year or before your still the same lovely, smiley, positive wee person which I think is such a credit to yourself.
My life lesson I think from last year has to be life is too short! Sadly our family lost my amazing auntie to Ovarian Cancer. She was such a fabulously strong, inspiration and amazing women and the world is definitely not as light without her around but she lived life to the full and even towards the end was so positive and loving and if I can be half the women that she was then im getting on ok 🙂
Thanks for all your content and making dull, sad days so much brighter with your fab personality!!
Look forward to all the more in 2018
thanks
Pammie xx
Oh wow thanks for coming over 🙂 It means a lot that it won’t be your last visit, yay!
Thanks so much for the positive feedback on my videos too, it’s awesome to hear that I’m still the same ole me 🙂 YAY!
I am SO sorry to hear about your amazing auntie, that is so heartbreaking! I lost someone last year too who was so young, so I can relate to how you must be feeling but you’re SO right about life being too short. We just need to grab everything with two hands and enjoy life a little more!
Lots of love gorgeous one, always here if you fancy chatting to a somewhat stranger 🙂 x
Thank you so much for your kind words – you may regret the offer of the chat hahaha 😉
xxx
NEVER EVER EVER EVER!!! xx
Oh Megan! I recently -about 2 months ago – discovered your channel and now your blog. I am so happy for your and your growth and success. It is amazing to hear about your growth and the tribulations that accompany that success. It’s often easy to overlook these when on the other side of the street. With success come a lot of issues we often don’t even imagine or if we do, we secretly think it won’t happen to us. While life may get more complicated as time goes by, I hope 2018 is more fruitful and amazing. I can’t wait to see more of your journey!
xx
Jessica
P.S. Sometimes love and friendships are seasonal…and that is okay…there will always be a new lovely season to look forward to. Hang in there.
I’ve been following you on Instagram for years but for some reason this is the first of your posts I’ve read!
I feel like this growth is something we all go through around 25-30 and it’s always lovely to read honest words about it. I feel like I’ve grown so much these last years, changing things about myself I didn’t like, like trying to be more extroverted, and embracing the rest. I lost most of my friends because they left for other countries, but now I’ve moved to the UK I’m really looking to be more creative, make new friendships, chase my dreams and become more of the person I want to be! Hope you have a wonderful 2018 Megan!
Oh wow, tahnk you for coming over babe! I’m so glad to hear you’ve found yourself and you’re chasing your dreams babe! Thats truly amazing to hear! Good luck with everything babe and lots of love x
Megan,
I just want you to know that you’ve changed my life. Literally. And i really want to hug you as a thank you, but I can’t. So i’m just leaving a comment 🙂
I was so discouraged and uninspired for so long that i’ve completly lost my passion for everything.
And now, with your blog and youtube channel, I feel more inspired than ever. You just bring me joy and courage to explore all the possibilities (not just in the fashion business but in every aspect of life).
Thank you so much.
Ps: sorry for the bad english, I’m from Brazil 🙂 <3
Ohhh Marcella <3 You're such a sweetie! I'm sorry that you were feeling discouraged and uninspired for a while! That really sucks!
But SO glad to hear you're back on top again and to know that my posts may have had just a tiny little impact on you honestly means so so much!
Thank you for commenting babe, it means a lot! xo